Friday, September 30, 2005

Tonight, I was sitting at the computer, listening to songs and hoping to find the perfect song to choose for a Father and Daughter dance at my parent's 50th anniversary. Imagine, 50 years married, to each other! Not something you see a whole of now a-days, but through thick or thin, they are now celebrating that golden day together in November.

Anyway, as I sat listening to songs, I got an IM from a very good friend who has always lived halfway around the world. Her father passed away this afternoon. Several years ago, she lost her mother too. I cannot imagine losing both of my parents.

Even as I find joy in the celebration of my parent's life together this evening, my thoughts are turned to a friend who is no longer able to talk to, hug or laugh with her parents. May God's peace be with her and her family not only as they go about the preparations for the funeral, but also during the difficult holiday times ahead.

Friday, September 23, 2005

It has been so wonderful to get away from the everyday stresses of life. All of the responsibilities that I have had to endure recently have weighed heavily on my shoulders. The least of which is the loss of income to our household.

This time away would not have been possible without the generosity of my brother and sister in law. They have treated me to a couple of nights in Cincinnati where we went to the Zoo and to the Aquarium. They have provided me with refuge and food in their home and have even given me a new pair of shoes. How can I ever thank them for the gifts I have received.

My thanks are to God who has opened their hearts to my need.

I wonder...Lord, how can I now serve others in gratitude for the things that I have received?

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Struggling with Understanding

I went to see a friend tonight who is dying, most likely, of cancer - brain, stomach, and lungs. He looked like hell - eyes sunk into sockets painted black, pastey white complextion, and has lost 38 pounds in two and a half weeks - cancer is truly evil. In my religion, I know God is not behind disease, but logic sometimes takes a backseat to the question of "WHY?" I just want to have the most unchristian temper tantrum. I want to scream obscenities at God and use Him for a punching bag...I know He understands and is not mad at me, which sort of intensifies the anger.

Earlier today, my husband and I made spaghetti sauce, all ingredients from our garden. We took it to a family about to face a horrible trama - daddy is having his leg amputated on the 28th. This is man is in his 30's, married, two young girls, and a severe diabetic. He already has lost all his toes on the other foot. He cries because he can not get out and play with his daughters, because he can not be the father he dreams of being. Obvioulsy, I have had an emotionally tramatic day.

I also miss my two friends, who are, by now, in West Virginia. They have family there - one has her son, wife, and two granddaughters and the other, her brother. I wish them a terrific vacation - they deserve some good times.

Well, good night world, tomorrow brings more, hopefully better days lie ahead.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Home Sweet Home

Stay home? Oh dear - home sweet home - cleaning, cooking, washing, phone, family worries, fun with Bill, and church work...sure, why not stay home, sounds like a lot of fun (wiseass smirk) Naw, this disorganized week will pay off once you reach your destination - a week with your brother, his wife, and kids. and your mom - life doesn't get sweeter. And, if the work office blows up, so be it...life will be sweeter, and the clean-up made easier by the memories you are about to creat - go, have fun, life will go on, and you can worry about life's clean-up when you get back!!!! May your journey be filled with memory creating materials that will bring smiles to your heart on your worse day at work!

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Drop Dead Tired

This week is a killer for some reason.

With meetings on Monday and Tuesday, Bowling on Thursday and a wedding on Friday, there is little time for rest and relaxation.

Well what about Wednesday, you ask? Let's see, write two articles for our newsletter, review a congregational budget, try to plan all the things I need to do before the special congregational meeting on the second and, .. oh yeah, I forgot...Pack my bags for a week's vacation!

Now shouldn't this be a joyous thing? But no, being drop dead tired, I can't decide what the heck I want to bring. I don't know what the weather will be like, I can't fit into most of the clothes I would love to bring, the dog ate my shoes, and I can't forget that damnable machine that helps me breathe at night. (Oh yeah, and I must remember to transfer the maps to the truck that I will be driving and to update my laptop's files before I go.)

How sad that life can be like that! How sad that the planning for a much needed vacation is so tiring that by the time I actually leave...I will need two vacations!

Oh yeah...and I won't even think about what things will be like at the office when I return... On second thought... maybe I should just stay home?

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

guilt and commentment

Guilt - a gift of our "horned" serpent. Each parent throughout the ages has instilled the concept of guilt into their children - "who did it?" a question Adam and Even never had to ask Cain when he killed his brother; however, seems parents need to know the answer - so guilt is a primary factor, seemingly simple in a family, but a huge delimna within social factors, due to the stigma of guilt instilled in most of us during childhood - thus the "pass the buck" syndrome. So, I am not surprised at the guilt syndrome (blame game) being played out regarding New Orleans. No one wants to take the fall; no one wants to lose their postion - it is childhood conditioning in action.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Commitment

I sometimes wonder why it is so darn hard for us to commit ourselves to things. As president of our congregation, one of my jobs is to schedule council meetings. During those meetings, we take time to build relationships among the members, participate in a learning process and then tend to the business of being the church.

People really do want to serve, but try to get 11 people all together on one day of the week! Times aren't like they used to be with parents home with their children on weekday evenings. Now that both parents work, all activities occur during those times. Who can find time to meet when you are bringing your children to scouting meetings, dance classes, sports events or simply spending much needed time with family? As their leader, I am always wondering....Is it unfair to expect people to meet yet one more night? What other ways can we bring people together that will make it less of a burden to them?

Yet, when I look at Jesus' call to his disciples...he expected so much more! Jesus said, "Follow me." It meant giving up everything and following. Once, when someone asked Jesus to give him time to bury his father, Jesus said, "Let the dead bury the dead." Is the call to discipleship today just as compelling as it was so many years ago?

And what of the burden? Jesus calls us to carry our crosses for his sake...and again...take up a yoke with Jesus...for the burden is light when shared with God. Why is it that we seem to want to forget this part?

To what ministry is Jesus really calling us?

Friday, September 09, 2005

The Blame Game

Ever since the beginning of time, the blame game has been played. God asked Adam and Eve, how did you know you were naked? The game began! Adam said, "It was the woman YOU gave me. She made me eat of the fruit." Eve said, "It was the serpant."

Today, in the wake of the inept response of the government to serve people devastated by floods, the blame game continues. "It is the Federal government's fault." "It is the state government's fault." "It is the local government's fault." "It is the people's own fault."

Have we not yet learned that we are all at fault in some way?

The good news is that God removed Adam and Eve from the garden so they would not eat of the tree of life...lest we would have to live on this earth to play the blame game forever and ever.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

The Sorrowing Monster

So many questions - answers, if any, change daily. I think the world has been exposed to the illness within the monster, and the monster turned out to be no threat after all. Well, maybe it is - maybe its threats to war and kill, but within itself, the monster fails. Lost in its external show-off status, always the bigger and better, and powerful, it has lost its own self, its life anorexic. Now the monster is frighten, blaming external forces for its own lack of care, exposing even more its withered underbelly.

Saturday, September 03, 2005

Giving and Receiving

God has given us such precious gifts...the gift of God's own son, the gift of eternal life, and the gift of the promise of God's kingdom present in the here and now. Can we graciously receive that which God has given us and isn't it time that we begin to graciously give back to God?

Yesterday, I was thinking about an old saying, "It is better to give than to receive." I realized that this old adage is part of today's attitude problems. In a society that uplifts power and wealth, the ability to give is associated with being successful. Having to receive is associated with the lack of success. I wonder how this plays out today when thousands of people are now out of work and homeless due to the hurricanes.

How difficult will it be for people to receive the gifts given by so many? How difficult will it be for the leaders of this nation who believe we are the strongest and the best to receive gifts from the world?

Do we give because it makes us feel important? Do we look down on those who give? Will our attitudes make it difficult for others to receive with their heads held high? I wonder if being a gracious giver, with no strings attached, from the motive of pure love, will help us to be gracious receivers in our time of need?

God has given us so many precious gifts...the gift of God's own son, the gift of eternal life, and the gift of the promise of God's kingdom present in the here and now. How can we graciously use that which God has given and isn't it time that we begin to graciously give back to God?